As a life coach, I have come to notice that most of my female clients are shown to be somehow perfectionists (myself included).
This is what drew my attention to figuring out the relation between women and perfectionism; I’m certain about how beneficial discovering this relation may really be for everyone who can relate to it.
According to Australia’s Biggest Mental Health Check-In, which is a mental health assessment consisting of 100 questions, answered by approximately 4980 workers, among two to four weeks period; proved that women had a high perfectionism score which is 33% while men are only 21%.
So, let’s look straight into these insights on perfectionism.
1. What Is Perfectionism
Perfectionism is considered to be “striving for flawlessness” – Hibbard, 2011.
In psychology, perfectionism is a personality trait characterized by
- a person’s strive for impeccability
- setting excessively high-performance standards
- being overly self-critical in evaluations
- being concerned about others’ evaluations.
However, in my words, perfectionism is not being able to settle for anything less than perfect from one’s perspective, it’s like setting no room for mistakes.
2. Perfectionism’s Effect
Hewitt, 1996 – learned that perfectionists only tend to look at the negatives in their lives because if something was not perfect, they were not happy.
With the individual not seeing the perfection in their performance, they would have little satisfaction in not only the things they do but also their lives as a whole.
However, focusing only on perfection is not an easy, if not impossible task. the unacceptance of what is imperfect may result in use not accepting anything at all, as mainly everything around us is perfectly imperfect as it is.
This discernment leaves us feeling unsatisfied and disappointed almost all the time.
3.Where the Relation Happens
As a woman myself, I believe that seeing the perfect body shapes, skin, and woman in advertisement campaigns around the streets, on television, or through social media in general, is indeed filling our subconscious minds with specific stereotypes that are majorly affecting us.
Also, in some societies, girls and women are also put under the pressure of societal prejudices such as “You’re a girl you cannot fail this exam” – which directly forms a relationship between not making mistakes and being a woman – as if only girls are supposed to be perfect and/or succeed.
4. Is This Relation Reversible or Changeable
Everything is changeable, literally.
It’s just a choice if you want to change it or not. If so, there are multiple ways you can change this relation.
- to become aware of the habit in order to reverse them.
- decide if you need help with it or not if you’re doing it on your own
- doing research about the reversing process and the effects it may have on your sense of being as a whole.
- If you assess the need for help, a life coach is your destination (since he/she is the person considered to be a “change agent”) when no psychological ailments are accompanying your state.
So, let’s turn that black or white perspective by adding a few greys here and there. After all, we’re all humans, we are allowed to make mistakes and fix them.